Khristine Wilcox
What was your journey to having the family life you have today?My journey has stemmed from how I was raised. Growing up, I always knew I want to get married and have kids. I wanted that fairytale life. I grew up in a very close-knit family so I always envisioned my life being somewhat similar to how I grew up.
I’m 75 percent Filipino and 25 percent Chinese. My husband is mostly Scottish and Irish. My family was very accepting to the fact that I would have a mixed-race family. My older brother always dated different races so my parents were pretty used to it. They just wanted to make sure my partner was a decent man and was going somewhere in life.
My husband and I try to blend our cultures together to reach a happy medium. We’ve had very different upbringings and we can see the differences when we make decisions together. As a result, we’ve learned to respect each other’s traditions and morals, and we try to learn about each other still to this day — and we’ve been together for seven years. Both of our families are very involved in child care as well so each side brings something from each culture, whether it’s food, language, or activities.
As of now, I don’t really worry about my son embracing both identities because he’s learning both as he grows. I do worry that being mixed may make others question him. I don’t want someone to tell him, “Oh, you don’t look Asian or you don’t look Caucasian.” I don’t want him to think heneedsto look both. I just want him to know that he’s unique and there are billions of people in the world and we don’t all look the same.
I feel better about things because nowadays, mixed families are becoming more and more common. I do recall making sure that we named our child something that wasn’t too Scottish or something too Asian so our son didn’t feel the need to be identified as one over the other. As long as we keep raising our child to recognize the beauty in diversity, I know he’ll be okay.
What’s the hardest part?For me, it’s not being able to figure out what’s going on. There are times when I don’t know what the issue is. Why is he upset? What’s wrong? Why can’t I fix it?
How do you find time for yourself?My time to myself is when I’m in the shower. Sometimes, I’ll stay in there for, like, 25 minutes. It’s fantastic. Work is also a place where I can take time for myself. I know it’s still work but I’m not tending to somebody else all the time. I can eat my lunch in peace.
What would you want your kid to say about you as a parent?I want my kid to say that I love him so much and I’ve showed him the world. Also, that I did everything to give him a good life and he can turn to me for anything.Andthat he can’t live without me. That’d be nice. Maybe that I’m cool, too.
source: people.com
