Nicole Shanahan at home on June 1.Photo:Jessica Chou
Jessica Chou
Nicole Shanahan is a 37-year-old attorney, founder of theBia-Echo Foundation, Stanford CodeX fellow, founder and managing director of Planeta Ventures and mother to daughter Echo, 4. In this week’s issue of PEOPLE, she opens up about feeling globally shamed online. In addition to being interviewed for the feature story, she has written the following personal essay that reflects her views.
It has been 12 months since theWall Street Journalpublished a storyclaiming I had an affair with Elon Musk, and that the alleged affair prompted my divorce. The story had major global appeal, and within days there were hundreds of headline articles and tens of thousands of social media posts commenting on theJournal’s claims. For nearly three weeks the story made headline news. I was thrust into the public eye, the online images and commentary felt more like a Zeitgeist than depictions of my lived experiences. The story was a forum for people to project their opinions on a wide variety of topics including extreme wealth, infidelity, and whether I’ve had plastic surgery (I have not). Details of my life were either presented incorrectly, out of context, or distorted for the sake of generating clicks. Like my age (I was 36 at the time, not 33), and my child (my child is born female, not male), and the story behind the advent of my work in women’s reproductive longevity (I believe IVF is sold irresponsibly, and my own experience with natural childbirth has led me to understand that the fertility industry is deeply flawed).
Nicole Shanahan at home on June 1.Jessica Chou
I can’t think of anything worse for a professional woman’s career than publicly shaming her for a sexual act. Worst yet, throw in infidelity. Worst yet, throw in two wealthy and famous men.
For more on Nicole Shanahan, pick up the latest issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday, or subscribehere.
The irony is that I am and have always been a bullish defender of the press. In high school, I published protest pamphlets decrying the war in Iraq. I’ve led student walkouts. I’ve worked on publications on the importance of information transparency, and generally just care a lot about democracy. I believe freedom of the press is one of the most important tenets of American liberty, and while I still do, I now am also deeply familiar with what it feels like to be the subject of fast and furious, and sometimes sloppy journalism. While I have a good sense of who theJournal’s handful of “sources” were for the article, and what motivates that group of people, I still don’t know why theJournalfelt it was ethically correct to move forward with the piece. The journalists who wrote it have no idea what has gone on in my life. They showed little appreciation for the personal motivations and bias of their “sources.” Instead, they displayed a reckless thirst for a popular hit piece, no matter the cost it would have on my life, the people I serve, and the child I care for.
In many ways, I was perfectly trained as a child to get through this chapter of my life — the frenetic weight of a mentally ill father and a shell-shocked mother taught me to lean into a personal sense of self that has been bullishly cultivated through times of chaos. Bad things happen, injustice happens, but there are always tools for overcoming them, it’s a matter of relentless commitment to oneself. I will never stop seeking self-actualization for myself, my family, and for the communities I serve.
Despite having a challenging childhood, “I was a very optimistic kid,” says Nicole Shanahan (in her 1997 softball portrait).Courtesy Nicole Shanahan
Courtesy Nicole Shanahan
In everything I do, I lean on the resiliency and majesty of nature to keep me going. To anyone facing hard days, my recommendation is this: walk barefoot on the earth, immerse in a natural body of water, let the sun glisten your skin, and listen to the wisdom of the love deep inside of you — it will never lead you in the wrong direction.
source: people.com
